Goodbye 2019: Year recap

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I’m leaving behind one of the toughest years in my life. So many things happened, the year was filled with emotions, inner fights and getting back on my feet again and again. That’s why I couldn’t wait to say this: Goodbye 2019, see you never ever everrr again!

I always love to take some time at the end of the year to review the year I had and create some goals for the next one. I can’t say those are resolutions, because that way I wouldn’t stick to them so much 🙂 What I’m up to in 2020 post is yet to come, but now let’s see what I’ve been doing in 2019.

I started 2019 with the quote: “a lot can happen in a year”. That was so right. However, January was quite calm, I dealt with heartbreak and charged myself with lovely walks in Ljubljana with my friends (oh what would I do without you!). I did quite some work for Dora Ward too.

In February, I went for my sea therapy. I didn’t swim of course, but it was so sunny and I really enjoyed a good book on the pier, where I like to bathe in the summer.

Oh, March, here we go. I was partying like crazy and still kept up with my work for the Uni, when at the end of the month I lost my best friend, which turned my life upside down. Even today, I find extremely difficult for me to write about him or the evening when it happened, so I’ll save these bitter memories for myself. I tattooed his initials on my wrist to take him with me wherever I go. This was also my first tattoo ever. It may sound supernatural or whatever, but whenever I really, really need him or ask him about something (I really need to “feel” it), it seems he helps me or takes care of my safety.

The upcoming months were a blur. In April, I created my first IGTV video about digital violence, which you can see over here, click. The other half of the month I was desperately planning my trip to Spain when I flew for the first time in my life!! We went to Barcelona in May and I did it with the airplane and everything, so flying was nothing to really worry about, in fact, I kindly enjoyed it. When in Spain, my anxiety hit me tremendously, so I needed to come back home earlier. Again, this took me a big lot of my will to recover and a lot of my hope that I will be better someday. And on top of all that, I felt so sorry for my friend that went with me through all of that. I am so grateful for her, I don’t know how this story would end if she wasn’t with me. I wrote about my first flight with some tips and tricks over here, click.

I spend the summer in my familiar areas, preparing for my last exams ever! I moved from Ljubljana back home, which I still don’t know if it was a good idea. I need a mental restart. You can read about how it is living with travel anxiety over here, click. At the end of the summer, I enjoyed a quick getaway with my lovely friend, which could last a bit longer since we had a really nice time there.

In the fall months, I accompanied my two great friends on the road to their Master’s. I am really glad I was able to be a part of that. Getting a new title in so important for me, and having good friends that stand by your side means the world. This year is my turn 🙂 

I think in November, a new life chapter began for me. One way I was still in my atypical mourning process, the other sent me some light in my life. Me and my blogger friends visited the Cosmopolitan conference and since that day on I also have a very special person walking through my journey with me 🙂

You know me in December, right? Christmas everywhere, festivities, friends gathering, good food, that me. I celebrated my 26th birthday (what!) and went for a traditional Christmassy getaway in Vienna. The magic in Vienna is unbelievable and I can easily say this city is one of my top three picks if I needed or wanted to move country. 

Jumping into New year in the arms of my loved ones meant a lot for me, finally closing the 2019 and widely open the 2020 gate, embracing everything new. Who knows what 2020 will bring me?

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Za mano je eno najtežjih in najbolj kompleksnih let, ki sem jih preživela. Toliko stvari se je zgodilo, leto je bilo nabito s čustvi, osebnimi spopadi in postavljanjem na noge znova in znova. Zato to objavo pišem z neskončnim veseljem, da lahko končno rečem: adijo 2019! Se vidiva nikoli!

 

Vedno si ob koncu leta vzamem čas za pregled leta in ustvarjanje novoletnih ciljev. Zaobljube jih ne morem reči, saj nisem prepričana, da bi se jih tako držala 🙂 Objava o novem letu še sledi, sedaj pa sem vam dolžna 2019 pregled.

2019 sem začela s stavkom: “a lot can happen in a year” – še kako prav sem imela. Januar je bil precej miren, spremljalo ga moje moje strto srce in ljubljanski sprehodi s prijateljicami (dobro, da vas imam!). Kar precej vneto sem fotografirala in pripravljala stvari za Doro Ward.

Februarja sem se odpravila na moj sea therapy – morje. Seveda se nisem kopala. Bilo je nadvse sončno in prijalo mi je branje knjige na pomolu, iz katerega se poleti rada vržem v osvežitev.

Marca sem na polno žurala po Ljubljani in sproti urejala vse potrebno na faksu, konec meseca pa sem izgubila svoje najboljšega prijatelja, zaradi česar se mi je življenje obrnilo na glavo. Še danes mi je izjemno težko pisati o njem in o dogodku, zato si bom tole prihranila zase, če dovolite. V spomin nanj sem si vtetovirala njegovo začetnico imena, da bo celo življenje hodil ob meni. Morda se to sliši izjemno čarovniško, vendar se mi zdi, da mi včasih, ko ga za kaj resnično prosim, stoji ob strani.

Aprila sem ustvarjala svoj prvi IGTV  video o digitalnem nasilju, ki si ga lahko ogledate tukaj, klik. Po drugi strani pa sem vneto planirala svoje prvomajske počitnice, ko sem prvič v življenju sedla na letalo. Uspelo mi je maja, letenje pa ni nič strašnega, globoko v sebi je moj potovalni duh užival. Seveda je nato nastopila moja tesnoba v epskih razsežnostih, zato sem morala domov predčasno. To mi je ponovno odvzelo voljo in upanje v to, da mi bo nekoč bolje. Povrh vsega pa mi je bilo žal še moje ljube prijateljice, ki je morala čez vse to z menoj, za kar sem ji po drugi strani izjemno in iz srca hvaležna. Brez nje se verjetno ta zgodba ne bi končala, kot se je. O tem, kako je prvič poleteti, sem pisala tukaj, klik.

Poletje sem preživela na domačem in znanem območju, da sem se lahko mentalno regenerirala. Kako je živeti s potovalno tesnobo si lahko prebereš tukaj, s čim si pa pomagam, pa si preberi tukaj, klik. Konec poletja sem si privoščila mini oddih na našem vikendu z mojo ljubo prijateljico, ki bi definitivno lahko bil malce daljši, saj sem se imela res fino.

Jeseni sem na pot k magistru pospremila svoji dve čudoviti prijateljici in res sem vesela, da sem lahko bila del tega. Pridobitev novega naziva je zame izrednega pomena in to, da ti ob strani stojijo dobri prijatelji, še kako vpliva na to, kako do tega naziva prideš. Da pa lahko še oni proslavijo s teboj, je pa še toliko bolj sladko. Letos pa bom jaz na vrsti, upam :).

Novembra se je zame začelo novo poglavje v življenju. Še z eno nogo v atipičnem žalovalnem procesu, se mi je zgodilo nekaj lepih stvari, ki so mi v življenje vnesle nekaj svetlobe. S puncami smo obiskale Cosmo konferenco, zato pa mi je dni popestrila tudi zelo posebna oseba, ki vse od takrat hodi ob meni 🙂

December je standarno rezerviran za moje božične podvige, praznovala sem 26.rojstni dan (uh!) in se odpravila na tipični adventni vikend na Dunaj. Spet, ja, vem. Magičnost Dunaja me prevzema že od nekdaj in lahko priznam, da je to eno izmed treh mest, o katerih bi razmišljala, če bi se želela seliti. No, zaenkrat ostajam, kjer sem, brez skrbi. Skok v novo leto v objemu mojih dragih je zame pomenil zaprtje vrat 2019 in objem nečega novega. Kdo ve, kaj mi bo prineslo 2020?[:]

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